19th Sunday Year A - Homily 5

Homily 5 -2020

God first appeared to Moses in the land of Midian, desert country near Mt Sinai, in the form of a “burning bush”. God’s later theophanies to Moses, on Mt Sinai, were generally more spectacular, accompanied by earthquakes, lightning, smoke and cloud. Today we read of God’s contact with Elijah, again in the desert of Sinai, in the form of “the sound of a gentle breeze”. I find that a highly evocative image. Other translations put it, “the sound of sheer silence”. I like that even better. Today’s Gospel presented a perhaps more intimate image. Jesus held out his hand to the terrified, drowning Peter, whispering to him, “Man of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Today we experience the departure of so many hurting, bewildered people from the Church. Their leaving is cushioned by the continuing faithfulness of people like yourselves, perhaps equally hurting and bewildered, yet hanging in. The source of my remaining in the Church would be, I think, something like the sense felt by Peter when Jesus reached out and held him. I would be surprised if you have not all intuited something similar — the kind of experience that moves you and me beyond mere knowledge of Jesus to deeper personal relationship and trust — that opens the way for him to hold us firmly, lovingly, as it were by the arm.

I am getting older. I have no idea when I shall die and, in an instant, move on to a wholly transformed experience of living. I look forward to meeting God, and experiencing directly and intensely God’s unimaginable, timeless love. These days, whenever I pray, I practise letting go of everything, letting go especially of my desire to control, and surrendering instead totally to God — still unfinished and far from perfect. Yet I am confident that Jesus will reach out to hold me by the arm, and don’t even care if he gently whispers in my ear, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”— I still trust him completely.